james lipton pays kiki a visit

1. how do you think your local bodega (convenient store) personnel perceive you? They don’t really see me very often. Though when they have seen me, I was either dying of a cold or extremely hung over. So they probably don’t think much of me, considering I usually have sunglasses and a hood on.
2. where is your favorite place you have lived? Edinburgh, Scotland. Every time I go I find it increasingly hard to leave.
3. where do you live? and what are your local hang outs? I live in Bushwick, Brooklyn. And no, I don’t call it East Williamsburg. People who call it that are sissies. My local hang outs are Wreck Room (all my friends work there), Life Cafe (which I used to hate), and a little park where I hang out with my dog.
4. describe your imaginary friend? (come on now, you were an only child. don’t be shy) Believe it or not, I didn’t have an imaginary friend. I did however have a fascination with a bunch of plastic horses that I had. And My Little Pony’s.
5. stance on veal and foie gras? In the words of Susie to a co-worker, “Oh… she’s an… animal activist”. Yeah… I think both are gross.
6. how do you think people perceive you upon first impression? Most women have told me that I come across as stand-offish or bitchy. Men have said that I just seem like I don’t take shit from people.
7. favorite cocktail? Slightly dirty gin (Bombay or Tanqueray) martini on the rocks with three olives. Which sounds like heaven right now. Oh and for those of you who dont know, you should never have an even number of olives. It’s bad etiquette.
8. glass half full or glass half empty? (lame, ok time to spice things up) Depends on how bad my day was and what I’m drinking.
9. most unorthodox job? Dominatrix in a dungeon.
10. first thing you ever shop lifted? Probably makeup or jewelry.
11. biggest sexual pet peeve? Whiskey dick. But that’s everyone’s pet peeve. I cannot stand when a guy holds my head. When I’m giving head its bad, and even worse when we’re actually banging. Like c’mon, do you really need that much more thrusting stability?
12. annoys you most about your boss? This could be a list unto itself. Probably the amount of times he says “I implore you to ask me about (insert whatever it is he wants)…” The dude needs way too much attention.
13. favorite swear word? The fuck word.
14. biggest indulgence? When I travel by myself I usually like to stay in a hotel if I have a bunch of layovers and the first thing I do is run a really hot bath. I literally close the door and strip off my clothes. I hang out in there for at least an hour or two. If I don’t go exploring, I order room service. Which is limiting, so sometimes I’ll run to a little grocery story and get a bunch of stuff and hang out on the bed and watch weird foreign TV. Japan is the best for all that, though they have small bath tubs.
15. what’s your biggest turn off? Anything to do with the mouth, really. Bad manners at the table, bad kissing, bad breath, improper use of grammar..
16. favorite reality tv show? I used to really enjoy Real World when I actually used to watch TV. I haven’t had cable in 8 years. Though I caught a few episodes of Rock of Love and A Shot At Love with Tila Tequila and they were awesome!
17. what age did you leave home? 15

18. have any pets?I have a cute little terror of a puppy named Bella. She’s half pit/half dachshund.
19. other than at work, who do you see most frequently?My main man, Dan. He’s the brother I never had. We have the strangest friendship ever. And I love it.

20. what’s the hardest thing you’ve recently had to do? Bite my tongue.

20 Questions

Suz and I had this great idea that we should interview each other so all of you can get to know us better. We both wrote out twenty questions for the other one and then we’ll both answer them once they’ve been posted. I have a feeling that Suz’s will be much more serious and interesting than mine is but that’s probably fitting.

Hi Suz, how are you?
That wasn’t the first question…. Alright, so here we go. And feel free to post pictures of stuff in your answers.

1. Where did you grow up? austin, texas. keep austin weird ya’ll!
2. Where are you currently living? orchard st, les, nyc
3. What’s the weirdest thing you like to eat? cottage cheese and frozen raisins
4. What’s your ultimate non-food guilty pleasure? reading on my fire escape watching the double decker tour bus riders point and take pictures of me in my native habitat
5. If you could have sex with any female celebrity, who would it be? dita von teese
6. Who’s wardrobe would you raid? rachel bilsons
7. Where are your top 3 hangouts in NY? 88 orchard cafe, my fire escape, west side bike path
8. What is your favorite libation? dirty beefeater martini with olives
9. Have you ever done the walk of shame, and can you describe it? i try to disguise my goofy smirk, i smudge my mascara even more in the attempt to remove, carry unmentionables in my clutch, my dress is inside out and i always walk or use public transportation
10. Why do you think we get along so well? our quirky sanity
11. What bands are you listening to right now? (List 5) ratatat, crystal castles, beirut, fischerspooner, junior boys
12. If you could go back in time, what era would you live in? the 1870’s high society with elaborate fussy fashion and regulated gender roles >
13. What’s your idea of the perfect date? an active and engaging activity where he majorly embarrasses himself
14. What are your current favorite movies? (List 3) religulous, mal educacion, breakfast at tiffany’s
15. What are your bad habits? losing my keys, saying “i understand,” eating the same thing for weeks
16. What’s a sexual pet peeve that you have? people touching my belly button
17. Can you describe the worst date you’ve ever been on? had dinner at 6:30, he told me he just lost a bunch of weight, he barely ate, was super passionate about fantasy baseball (wtf is that?), could only talk about college and his frat…skipped dessert
18. What is always in your bag? (List 5) lip balm, kleenex, cell, debit, ishuffle
19. Do you identify more with your mother or your father? papi
20. What’s the best compliment you’ve ever gotten? translated from spanish, “your eyes are like luscious grapes and i want to devour them.”

-suz