Who needs craigslist?

When you can meet fine, young gentlemen while walking your dog?

For example: Tonight when I got home from studying all day with Suz, I decided to take Bella to the park so she could run around. I let Bella off her leash and am standing in the park, which is really a baseball field, where there are no lights on and the sun had already gone down. To an onlooker, I most likely looked like a shadow and you definitely wouldn’t be able to see any of my features. Most likely just an outline, and conveniently I have breasts so that you can tell I’m female. My gentleman caller, standing against the fence about 25 feet away, was obviously swayed by ominous, faceless figure and decided to let me know, from said-distance away:

“Hey, you’ve got great legs!”

Me: “Uh… Thanks” (In a very flat, monotone voice)

“Ya wanna have some fun?”

Me: “No. Thank you.”

“You sure? I got a condom.”

Me: “Wow. That is SO romantic. But I’m good, thanks.”

“I mean, I’m just being straight up. Ya know?”

Me: “Yeah. I got it. Now get the fuck out of my face.”

And, to think I could have made sweet love to this gentlemen is almost calling me back to that baseball diamond. Oh well, there’s always next time.

~Kiki